Define Carpenter Meaning

Carpenter
A man who has wood and does things with it. Carpenters use their tools for such purposes as screwing, drilling, and reaming. Rubbing and sawing away at old logs are also common activities. Nailing, while definitely an important part of carpentry, is not nearly as good as screwing. Carpenters also often get glue all over their wood.
While carpentry is an important and serious subject - after all, without it, we wouldn't have such things as chairs, desks, tables and doors - the terminology of carpentry is fraught with opportunities to make crass sexual innuendos.
Carpenters themselves, of which I am one, exploit these opportunities whenever possible.
Jesus was a famous carpenter, but all the jokes were removed by po-faced editors when he wrote The Bible.

Drilling, screwing, nailing, reaming, rubbing - all things done by a carpenter.
By Celesta
Carpenter
Someone who has a hammer, aka a big dick.

Girl 1: Dan is such a carpenter
Girl 2: Why is that?
Girl 1: He has a hammer!
Girl 2: A hammer?
Girl 1: Yeah, a big dick!!
By Gizela
Carpenter
What Jesus did as his part time job lol

Jesus was good with handling wood lol him and his little fisher price carpenter toolkit
By Charis
Carpenter
the act of a woman giving a hand job while holding a piece of sandpaper.

"dude! i almost went to the hospital 'cause that bitch tried to give me a carpenter"
By Marylou
Carpenter
A short gay fag that rapes girls after getting them drunk.
also known as Dick, Asshole, Douche bag, "carp", or LIAR.

"carpenter waited until Hannah passed out, then took off her pants and shirt and took pictures."

guy 1: "i just did 5 years for being a carpenter"
guy 2: "i hope you learned your lesson.."
guy 1: "Well i'm going Mexico this spring break so we'll see"
By Philly
The Carpenter
when you bang a girl using a 4x4 as a strap-on

the carpenter hurts like hell I have a splinter in my ass
By Althea
The Carpenter
the act of wrapping sandpaper around your Penis and having sex with a woman

after i used the carpenter she was smooth as a pebble
By Brenna
Carpenter
A carpenter is a legit, badass, problem solving, beer drinking, tang slaying, beast of a man!

Mary: man my dude is a pussy!
Mary’s friend: bitch you shoulda got you a carpenter! My man is the shit. Fixes everything and smashes like a beast!
Mary: well gotta Ditch this electrician!
By Oralee
Carpentize
The poorest attempt to convert a noun into a verb, done typically by those who have little understanding of the actual processes of Carpentry. Often this word is an attempt to replace the term Sanding or an attempt to shorten a seemingly long descriptive phrase of the crafting of products through the use of wood.

Ignorant Man: "I THINK I SHOULD CARPENTIZE TODAY."
Educated Worker: "Shut up noob."
By Sharleen
Carpenter
A person who is a problem solver for a high class crime family, usually fixing said problems with the problem disappearing without a trace.

By Griselda