You eat 3-4 cans of whole corn, or one to two ears if your that kind of person, one day before meeting up with your dream girl. When your girl goes to philash you, say "hold on bessie your getting a farmer john today", you start "plowing" her from behind. Then when the mood is right, flip her over and let out your corny top soil in a nice row on her chest. Poke a few holes in the soil and make sure to plant enough man seed for a good harvest.
My girlfriend wanted to go out dancing, but she had to stay home and wash off her farmer john.
When I came home from the fair I called Bubba...then we unloaded Bessie from the trailer and did The Farmer John.
By Cherie
Farmer John
A reference to being a ladies' man or player; usually self proclaimed.
Farmer John is a character who is most commonly found on a farm around livestock, including but not limited to chickens. Hence the term Farmer John may be used in reference to "gettin chicks"
An act where a male dips his moist testicles into a bucket of salt. The male then climbs up onto a cattle fence with his testicles free for all the world to see. He then proceeds to call over the cattle which have quite the liking for salt. Whilst the bovine is licking the man's testicles like a melting ice cream cone, the male proceeds to thrust his penis repeatedly into the nostril of the cow until climax.
Old man Smitha was always sure to have at least one sick cow with a runny nose to prevent chaffage during his daily performance of the farmer John salt lick.
