Define Instead Meaning

Instead
A new menstration sanitary device. Inserted directly into the vagina, designed collect the blood in a durable cup that lasts for up to 12 hours.Painful at first but, when used properly much more efficent than a tampon or pad.

Menstrating girl 1: Hey Tina do you have a tampon?
Menstrating girl 2: Sorry Mabel but I only have insteads.
Menstrating girl 1: WTF??
Menstrating girl 2: Just put them in like a tampon, but much further.
Menstrating girl 2: My finger gets bloody but my underware are spotless!!
Both: incessant giggling
By Gwyn
Insteading
When you're doing anything but the assignment that you're supposed to. Avoiding writing your paper/essay or doing any study related activity by involving yourself in anything that can distract you Procrastination.

She ended up insteading in the lounge all night instead of working on the paper that was due last monday.
By Alameda
Mud Instead Of Wind
What you get when you think your fart is gonna be air but instead its mud. its a 50/50 gamble.

I tought I was gonna rip a nice fart but i actually shit my pants.
Ah my friend, you got mud instead of wind.
By Farrah
Banana Milkshake With Salt Instead Of Sugar
Apparently if you make a banana milkshake with salt instead of sugar it tastes like jizz

I don’t fucking know just make a banana milkshake with salt instead of sugar because your a coward and don’t want to drink your own nutmilk like a chad
By Feodora
If The River's Red, Try The Dirt Track Instead
Comical saying. Means if your woman's flowing, do her up the arse.

Dave: Man, I can't have sex with Lucy at the moment, she's having her period!
Phil: So what? If the river's red, try the dirt track instead!
By Susan
If The River Runs Red Take The Dirt Track Instead
If one's girlfriend is on a period one should stick one's cock up her ass instead

When a man fucks his lady up the ass because she is on her periods to avoid a bloodstained cock
By Pavia
Corn On The Cob But Instead Of The Corn Bone It’s A Hot Dog
A creation of popular YouTuber JennaMarbles’ friend, Jason Sullivan, in which the bone of a corn cob is replaced by a hot dog.

Yesterday, I made a corn on the cob but instead of the corn bone it’s a hot dog. It was awful.
By Annaliese
When Your Stupid Posts Get Uploaded Instead Of Your Good Ones
STOP UNEXCEPTING MY DEFINITIONS AND UPLOADING MY STUPID ONES. Let me just say, if this gets posted I will shit myself laughing.

It's kind of self explanatory.

When Your Stupid Posts Get Uploaded Instead of Your Good Ones
By Florina
F.W.T.B.T. (I Dream Of Lars Ulrich Being Thrown Through The Bus Window Instead Of My Mystikal Master Kliff Burton)
Standing for: For Whom The Bell Tolls this is a somewhat cover of the Metallica song of the same name. The cover was created by dronemetalists Sunn O))) (pronounced sun).

I hate Lars so much what a d-bag he makes me want to listen to F.W.T.B.T. (I Dream of Lars Ulrich Being Thrown Through the Bus Window Instead of My Mystikal Master Kliff Burton) all day long!

rip cliff burton
By Krysta
Why Am I Spending Many Minutes Making Random Definitions On Urban Dictionary Instead Of Doing Something Better With My Life?
something everyone who has made more than 2 definitions has asked themselves but ha not decided to ever get help for. you are not alone.

*opens computer *opens urban dictionary *types in " why am i spending many minutes making random definitions on urban dictionary instead of doing something better with my life? " *realizes he is worthless
By Sophey