Define Jared Meaning

Jared
hes 19 and never learned how to fucking read

Teacher: Jared could you read this

Jared:i cant Hi my name is Jared and i never fucking learned how to read
By Amitie
Jared
really tall guy who is an athlete mixed with a nerd, movie buff, also refered to as the elusiv whit man

By Marjie
Jared
A male of the mentally challenged variety who enjoys showing up thirty minutes late to everything, crying while masturbating, killing homeless people because he is protected under the Second Class Citizen Law, and trying to bone highschool girls.

Jordan: Hey, i thought your friend was going to be here by now.
Jay: Yeah, it’s Jared so he’ll be 30 minutes late as usual.
By Gianna
Jared
someone who is a kid all The time no mater his age and suck BBC all the time

"did you see jared he was on a BBC"
By Christiana
Jared

that jared is cool
By Denna
Jared
a person whos name is jared duh. hes weird and random at times and he also sings annoying songs that get stuck in my head. blahzerz!

jeny: jared your soo weird

jared: no u!

jeny: jk your cool

jared: no u!

jeny: aww thanks teehee!!

jared: no u!

jeny: k.. getting annoying now.

jared: lalalala

jeny: ah my ears!
By Ivette
Jared
(v.) the act of sodomizing an unsuspecting homosexual negroid; often results in the contraction of AIDS. When jareding, the perpetrator lures in a pack of niggers with a bucket of fresh KFC. As the apes feast on the chicken, he thoroughly inspects them, searching for the one with the largest, most African elephant dick.

Although penises with piercings and other tribal deformities are preferred, the largest cock will suffice for jareding. Once a suitable porch monkey is selected, he will coerce the creature with pictures of female apes. As the negroid achieves a massive erection, the jareder will sneak up and position his well greased anus above the shaft.

In one swift motion, the perpetrator impales his ass on the cock and rides it like a cowboy from Brokeback Mountain, eventually causing the negroid to ejaculate. In the final step of jareding, the sick fuck will proceed to collect the semen and pour it over fresh chalupas, as he is usually 13 year old faggot Taco Bell fanboy. As he eats the chalupas, the jareder smiles with joy stroking his tiny 2.3" dick to a picture of Jack Bauer, contemplating his next victim.

Blake: My asshole is feeling really tight, you wanna go jared tonight?

Jared: Sure Mr. Locati! I'd love to go, although I call dibs on your freshly made semen-covered tacos, I'm too much of a curly headed fucking jew to pay for Taco Bell! Did I mention I'm gay?
By Celestine
Jared
a gay right handed man that thinks he is good at everything and feels that google is the beholder of all.

I'm right,my name is jared.
By Nadean
Jared

By Brigid
Jared
a man who makes orgasm noises to the point of turning purple. he lives in online forums and enjoys driving people crazy. he also is usually found 69ing a fake stuffed turtle. also can be used as a verb such as "I just jareded that turtle" and insult. EXTREMELY GAY

youve been spending alot of time on those forums lately, your starting to turn into a jared.
By Willa