Q: How do yo confuse a blond?
A: Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.
Q: What did Jimmy's grandma get him for Christmas?
A: Nothing. She died on
Thanksgiving day.
Q: How do you make an electrician sad?
A: Kill his family.
Q: How do you kill a blond?
A: There are many different ways, but all of them would be wrong, because murder is illegal.
Q: What did the man with no arms or legs get for Christmas?
A: Cancer.
Q: What did the women say after her husband hit her?
A: Nothing. She was physically abused for 35 years before committing suicide.
Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7?
A: It can't be, because numbers are not sentient and do not fear anything.
Q: What does baseball and the Holocaust have in common?
A: They are both sports, except the Holocaust.
Q: Why do black people
love chicken?
A: Because it tastes good.
Q: What's worse than
rainy days?
A: Getting raped by a giant scorpion.
Q: Why did the Jew pick up the one dollar bill?
A: He dropped it.
Q: How did
the fat man survive the plane crash?
A: He didn't he died like everyone else.
Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was angry. Really angry.
She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0-200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!"
The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway.
He quickly pulled out a .
44 Magnum and murdered her violently.
A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks "
Why the long face?"
The horse replies, "My wife died in a car accident."
A man walks into a bar and orders six shots.
The bartender asks, "Rough day?"
The man replies, "
Yes, very rough."
The man later went home and hung himself.
Did you hear about the blond who jumped off a bridge?
She died.
Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
I have a gun
Get in the car.
Anti-jokes are hilarious.