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Define Ass Monkey Meaning

Ass Monkey
An awkward neighbor or boyfriend/girlfriend in your dorm who invites himself/herself to meals, parties, and other social events. Ass monkeys attach themselves to specific groups or individuals by seeing that other individuals are able to invite themselves to events but still be welcomed companions.

Sketchball A: We need to go out the side door. If we don't your ass monkey will come with us to dinner.

Sketchball B: Tru that 'ho. I don't want my ass monkey fucking up my Pimp Committee.

Mutual Friend of Sketchballs A and B: I swear Sketchball B. If your ass monkey comes to one more meal with us I'm going to jump off a bridge.
By Allianora
Ass Monkey
A person (usually a man) who i such an asshole that people leave the room when he enters and announces his presence.

At Jake's wedding, Dan was such an ass monkey that entire sections of the bride's family left the reception early.
By Katy
Ass Monkey
n. an individual who, when in an argument, just makes up statistics and quotes from authorities on the subject so they look correct
v. to make up statistics or quotes to appear more correct

n. Dan is such an ass monkey; there's no way that CNN had an exit poll that said that 87% of Americans want socialism.
v. I totally ass monkeyed through that test. There's no way Mrs. Clark will know that Teddy Roosevelt actually never said anything about anarchy's role in society.
By Nata
Ass Monkey
Someone who constantly follows someone else around and agrees with everything they say and do.

"hey, should we invite Ben around tonight?"

"nah, his ass monkey Matt will have to come too."

"oh yeah. let's not."
By Kamila
Ass Monkey
Small monkey like creatures the size of leprichauns who crawl around your ass while your asleep. ass monkeys usually wedgie guys in tighty whites or chicks wearing g's or thongs. As monkers are also the reason lint appears in your ass. If you capture an ass monkey it will play poker with you.

*Chick* I got such a wedgie last night
*guy* Me to, I blame ass monkeys
*Chick* You were tighy whites? You a fag nerd
By Yelena
Ass Monkey
1) A person, a male, that is always hanging around other peoples asses; usually with the goal of having intercourse with that persons ass; ass clingy

2) A sex position where two gay guys are having anal sex doggy style, and the male on top is using his feet and hands to keep himself mounted on the other male. The ass monkey is the one portrayed as a monkey. It is common for ass monkeys to have AIDS. Sometimes the ass monkey could swing down from his mounting place and have some banana and grapes to eat.

1) Bob is such an ass monkey, he just won't stop following Sarah.

2) The man expertly performed an ass monkey
By Linn
Ass Monkey
A primate trained in the subtle art of ass pleasuring

ahh ass monkey... (rhetorical)
By Tallie
Ass Monkey
a nice word for asshole

Dick is a real ass monkey!
By Simona
Ass Monkey
a man who is constantly made a fool of by bitches

Him a ass monkey when it come to women.
By Honey
Ass Monkey
A piece of turd that lingers in the rectal domain, caught on by strands of choda hair.
The only way to remove the ass monkey is by cutting the particular ass hair that it hangs from.

"Dude, I got the biggest ass monkey ever."
"Let me see your ass monkey"
By Ilyssa