Boy 1: ...he was completely out of it by midnight!
Boy 2: Oh, did you make sure he got home safely?
Boy 1: No, we stripped him naked, drew a massive dick on his back, shaved his pubes and left him in a cardboard box outside the police station, smiling and whistling the national anthem to himself.
Boy 2:
Bants!!
Eton headmaster: You were representing our school on that debating trip chaps. We expected you to reflect its prestigious reputation as one of the most elite institutions in the country. Instead you trashed the hotel room, defaced the opposing school's
minibus and were caught staggering around town in stolen
tuxedos and
party hats at 2am carrying a sheep. How on earth can you justify this?
Lad: It was mere
bants sir.
Headmaster: Bants... as in banter? Very well then lads,
off you go.