Define Ted Talk Meaning

TED Talk
Used in a sarcastic tone when someone has made an obvious "scientific discovery". Derives from the global TED conferences.

Person 1: "I left my water bottle outside in the snow and it froze!"

Person 2: "Really? Maybe you should do a f***ing TED talk about it, surely no one has heard of that before."
By Shela
Ted Talk
A conference, a lecture. Mostly used when no one asks anything, but you randomly start talking. You can be serious or faking seriousness for humor, it is used at the end of the last sentence to make the speech seem less serious.

I am more maniac than you think. I have 3 big pillows with 3 different functions that are totally not related to their original function and I can't sleep without them. Thanks for coming to my ted talk
By Rebe
Ted Talk
The scientific term for an orgy where all participants have an IQ of over 130

"Hey Jeff, did they invite you to that Ted Talk last week?"

"I scored pretty poorly on my SATs, they didn't let me in"
By Marline
TED Talk
When Ted Cruz talks you into having an extra marital affair for the purposes of furthering your political career.

I was reluctant to give in, but after a well executed TED Talk, I was more than willing to follow Ted into the broom closet.
By Hephzibah
TED-talk Voice
1) A self-important tone used by a TEDtard to explain something obvious or stupid.

2) A manner of interpersonal communication that sounds too practiced or polished, like public speech.

3) Any way of communicating that betrays the speaker's desperation for validation by an audience of people who self-identify as intellectuals.

1) John's TED-talk voice did little to compensate for his lifelong habit of unoriginal thought.

2) Weekly meetings would be less intolerable if Lundberg would quit using that TED-talk voice he must have learned in B school and instead show some humanity.

3) Martha's incessant TED-talk voice stood out like the one Australian accent in the room, only instead of charming it was obnoxious. Her desperation for peer validation was as pathetic as it was irritating to anyone within earshot.
By Anette
TED-talk Voice
A singsongy, patronizing tone used to air your latest mundane idea that you appear to think is some kind of high-brow epiphany.

Your proposed solution to all of the world's problems would leave everybody who isn't a white middle-aged man with a steady job to fend for themselves. Put away the TED-talk voice and go do the math, you pretentious fuck!
By Chiarra
Thank You For Coming To My Ted Talk
Phrase used after you say something (generally a longer story) and no one responds, similar to how a ted talk works.

You: *tells a long story about how you dropped your enchilada*
group chat: *doesnt respond
You: Thank you for coming to my ted talk
By Christiana
Thank You For Coming To My Ted Talk
Celebrities like Kate McPherson have been known to end tweets with this statement. In some ways it's a full on acknowledgement of a personal idea or claim but a dismissal of anyone's negative response to the claim. In other words, I want you to know this information but I am not particularly concerned with your opinion regarding said information.

Nicki Minaj is constantly biting off of Cardi-B...thank you for coming to my ted talk
By Mommy
In This TED Talk I Will...
Used when making a rant as a sarcastic joke but not really wanting to type the whole thing out.

"Ryan from HSM actually liked Zeke, In this TED talk I will..."
By Jacki
Thanks For Coming To My TED Talk
It's used when you say something important but that not many people consider or even think about.

thomas sharpe from crimson peak is one of tom hiddleston’s best characters please appreciate him and thanks for coming to my ted talk
By Francisca