Place:
A town in northern
Fairfax County between
Sterling VA and
McLean. Great Falls differs from most of Northern Virginia by having homes on very large yards and having no apartments or townhomes whatsoever. Because it offers a wealth of land and privacy in the middle of the D.C. metro area, homes and estates in Great Falls command very high prices. Within Great Falls is a park with waterfalls that take the lives of several kayakers a year and cliffs that injure dozens of freeclimbers and parkour enthusiasts.
Great Falls has no sidewalks, but many cyclists. There are also many exotic sports cars and fast, winding roads. Because of this, Great Falls has more cyclists hit by Ferraris than any other part of the country. Everyone in Great Falls knows who their neighbour is but has never met them, mostly because 12-foot gates are not very welcoming. There are only two roads to travel from Great Falls to Washington, D.C. This leads to
failtastic traffic jams all day.
Man in Great Falls: - "I paid $11 million for a 20,000
SqFt. house with a multi-level deck,
infinity pool, tiki bar, pool house for my emo son, basement movie theater, five car garage, horse barn, ballroom, and two-story
master bedroom. "
"Five months later, Dick Cheney moves in across the street. FML"
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Girl 1: - "What's that sound?"
Girl 2: - "That would be my next-door neighbour
Gilbert Arenas having another party"
Girl 1: - "He sure is noisy for a dude that lives a quarter-mile down the road!"
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Mom in Great Falls: - "John Kerry lives next door"
Visitor: - "Oh?" "How is he?"
Mom in Great Falls: - "I have no idea, I've never met him"
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Guy: - "Some Verizon exec just got hit by a Lambo while he was biking in the road"
Friend: - "What an idiot!" "You'd think they'd build a bike trail for all the idiots in the middle of the road"