Define A Jesus Meaning

A Jesus

Drill sergeant: "Look, boys, we got a Jesus here! Get his ass in that barber chair!"
By Dorolisa
A Jesus
Something really amazing that someone did.

Boy: "I got 98% on that test about the economic revolution in southern Russia during the time of Stalin's rule, even though it was supposedly really hard and everyone was freaking out about it, especially that one girl with the really ugly hair. Christ, she's crazy."

Boy 2: "Oh shit man! That's a jesus right there!"
By Marj
Jesus Jesus JESUS
Used in escalating anger when saying one Jesus isn't enough. With each jesus said the tone becomes louder and stronger so by the third jesus you are using everything you got.

(a ketchup bottle falls from the fridge and smashes all over the floor)
jesus Jesus JESUS!!!!!
By Kalinda
Jesus
Saying "Jesus" backwards sounds like "Sausage" try it.

Jesus backwards:
Susej = Sausage!

Now thumbs up this comment, or I KILL YOU.
By Charmain
The Jesus

By Dyanne
Jesus
Jesus will be the best person you will ever meet. He loves to talk to anyone who is feeling down and will comfort you when you need it. If you see one tell them they are the best person ever. He will always love you no matter what. If you date one. He will never cheat on you. Even though some of you disagree. He loves to talk to anyone. Always loves to meet people. Also, he is very smart in math. He loves people who are very generous. He hates people who always think who is always right. He thinks that every girl is beautiful no matter how ugly you look.

Jesus said to Maria you look amazing today.
By Gloria
Jesus
Jesus is a common male name for Hispanics. Jesus is the guy that will take your girl.

Aye Jesus isn't that Michaels girl??
By Elayne
The Jesus

"Nobody fucks with The Jesus!" - The Jesus
By Etta
Jesus
A pretty cool guy whose reputation has been run down by his horrible fan-club.

Used by the said fan-club as an excuse to do whatever they decide is “right.”

Dude: “Hey! What the hell are you doing to my car???”
Other dude: “Jesus’ will.”
By Lucille
Jesus
The Son of God according to Cristians, and the only person ever to be blamed for commiting billions of different crimes after he had already died (dee-de-dee). He was a man who is blamed by many for things he didn't do rather than priased for the good things he did do. People are dumb. They often look at the evil doings of people who aren't Jesus and blame him for things they did just because they said it was Cristian-like so they could get away with it, such as slavery and the slaughter of homosexuals. Those things are evil and it goes without saying that some Christians are an utter disgrace to the poor guy. Jesus made it quite clear that you shouldn't put others below yourself for your own greed and racist intentions, and certainly told us NOT to kill each other. Jesus was a virtuous man who never wanted people to hide behind his reputation as a peacemaker so they could get away with committing acts of evil. People who do such acts, according to many faiths (not just Christianity), will probably pay for it in full.

Thou shalt not kill. (self-explanatory)
Thou shalt not bare false witness against thy neighbor. (in other words, don't blame people for things they didn't do. Jesus never killed or enslaved others, WE did, so don't take it out on him).
Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's goods. (don't be a greedy bitch)

Don't be a hater, Jesus loves everyone.

And if that doesn't convince you, remember, Jesus saved Chuck Norris.
By Kessia