The legendary
war criminal and mayor of
Portland, Oregon, Ted (Tevis) Wheeler. He loves attacking his citizens with chemical weapons, hates the homeless & the power, and pepper-spraying dairy heirs. He is a truly
horrible man renowned on a national scale for his crimes.
Do you think we're gonna forget about you? We're never gonna forget you, Tevis.
Tevis, the only problem we have is that you are an incompetent mayor.
America's renowned war criminals including George W. Bush,
Henry Kissinger, and, of course, Tevis.
The Pope announced today that Tevis is going to hell and all
penance for his sins will be suspended effective immediately.
Tevis loves brutalizing his own people so much that he is now afraid to go in public because he fears their retribution.
We need to completely recall Tevis and never let this happen again.
We saw Tevis walking in to Walmart wearing a large sombrero and sunglasses in disguise so no one would ask him about his
war crimes.