1. A (guy): "Dude, look at herrrr" *points*
Me: "I know, man and . . OH! LOOK AT THE LOSER SHE'S WITH!
THAT MOTHERFUCKER IS UGGGLLYY"
A: "Total
travesty"
B (girl): "Maybe he's
well-endowed?"
Me: "SO THE FUCK WHAT?!?! I CAN SATISFY A BLUE WHALE HERE
*
unzips and flips it out* AND SHE'S WALKING AROUND
WITH HIM AND I'M A HUNDRED TIMES BETTER LOOKING THAN
HE WILL EVER BE! HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN THAT SHIT?!?"
*B & A stare at my
ginormagantuan penis*
B (girl): "uhhh. . . *regains focus* Actually, girls pick
ordinary and ugly looking boys because they are
faithful and the girl can be the one who dominates
the relationship because she is the hotter one and
theoretically could leave whenever they wanted"
Me: "Wow. But hot guys can be loyal?"
B (girl): "Actually hot guys are more likely to stray if
they find someone hotter. The girls don't want to
be hurt like that. Hence, the ordinary boys. And
even if the girl is hot to the hot guy, she'll
always be insecure and think she's not good enough"
A and Me: "
Ahhhhhhhhh . . ."
B (girl): "By the way, that's a huge dick *smiles*"
Me: "Yeah i know *stuffs in and
zips up*
2. When the morning cries and you don't know why it's
TRAVESTY! . . . uh . . shit
