Define Guidance Meaning

Guidance
A period in school time where they try to teach you about life.
No one ever listens but they eat and mostly sleep for an hour.

burger-"What food did you get for guidance?"
Me-"I got two ham rolls and some chocolate bars."
burger-"Cool."
By Aileen
Guidance

By Mirabella
Guidance Counselor
A particularly lame and moronic adult that spends most of the day patronizing unhappy children/teenagers while under the delusion that they are making the world a better place. Except in very rare cases, they usually end up screwing kids more than helping them. Tend to smile too much. Approach with caution.

Mrs McKay, the middle school guidance counselor, smiled at the distraught young boy and, instead of giving him any useful advice, told him to just ignore the kids that threw trash at him on a daily basis. Then she gave him an animal cracker and asked how many guns he had at home.
By Elysha
Guidance Counselor
A person employed in the field of Education who drinks a shit load of coffee and pisses off the teachers in his/her school by sitting at his/her desk all day surfing the net, drinking coffee and talking on the phone while they have to deal with 30+ unruly brats all day. Often times this person is a former teacher who had zero classroom control and realized that they could get the best of both worlds (summers off, out the door by 3pm and not have to deal with kids) by going to Graduate School and becoming a Guidance Counselor.

After walking by a classroom of 30 unruly 2nd graders, the Guidance Counselor walked into his office, closed the door, poured himself a cup of coffee, called his girlfriend, logged onto the internet, turned the radio on, leaned back in his chair and said, "this is the life!".
By Salli
The Guidance Center
A non-profit organization that operates under ass backwards rules and regulations run by idiotic, ego tripping, morons with grandiose delusions.

assinine hell dysfunctional convoluted transient grossly underpaid grossly overworked stupid retarded the guidance center
By Madeleine
Parental Guidance
The presence of a parent or an adult within earshot of a conversation that a teen is having with another teen with a topic they don't want the adults to know about.

while talking on the telephone:
Teen1:"So how was your date with the new hottie from school?"
Teen2:"Uhm...will tell you about it tomorrow..."
Teen1:"Oh! So there's parental guidance there now eh?"
Teen2:"Yup!"
By Damita
Career Guidance

I don't really have anything funny to put here but I don't know if I have to write "career guidance" for the definition to be accepted so here it is
By Pattie
Guidance Counselor
A stupid bitch that you get sent to when the teacher cant deal with you opening your soda "loudly" Often after being sent to the hoe your parents get contacted for no goddamn reason. Often this person makes you suicidal and is a snake. One minute your in her office drinking tea the next shes suspending you for something you didn't do and she has no proof you did it.

Student: so we are all good this was just a misunderstanding
Guidance counselor: Yes ill call your mom just so she can " understand " what happened.

Student: Nothing happened though you even said it yourself.
Guidance counselor: leave my office im trying to work.
By Gabey
Parental Guidance
The act of two lovers having sex on their parent's bed.

"we safe sex under parental guidance"
By Helga
Underground Guidance Counselor
When you a student in high school handout free condoms and possibly literature about safe sex. However the expense is actually being paid by the guidance counsel office (who would get in trouble if they were to hand out free condoms and possibly literature on lgbtttq safe sex).

“I was a underground guidance counselor in high school” said Shelby.
“WTF is that??” asked toriah .
“In high school I would be provided condoms and safe sex pamphlets from the actual guidance counselors in my high school who were scared , that parents would call the school. I would hand the condoms out every Tuesday, and be known as a underground guidance counselor “.
By Kim